.

.

Right click here to download…

.

Toni Reece: Thank you so much, Karen, for joining us today on the Project, and before we begin, can you introduce yourself?

Karen Kramer: Sure.  My name is Karen Kramer, and I’m a wife and mother of two.  I’ve been in the marketing and communications field for nearly three decades – I don’t like saying it that way, maybe I need to rethink how I put that, but …

Toni: Oh, just for a bit.

Karen: Yeah.  Three years ago I received my certification in life coaching.

Toni: Okay, congratulations.

Karen: Thank you.

Toni: So Karen, when you think about that word inspiration, who do you inspire and how do you do that?

Karen: You know, Toni, when we originally talked about this, just talking about this interview, I think I might have even mentioned to you, oh my gosh, what a profound question because I think that many of us don’t even think about who we inspire.  We just do things the best way we know how to do it, and we give advice and we offer our support.

So thinking about this, I would like to think that I totally inspire my children.  I know that I do my daughter who is in her fourth year of college and 21, a little bit more insightful than my 18-year-old son just with the fact that she listens.  I’m able to share with her some of my experiences so that she doesn’t make maybe the same mistake.

And I know that it’s important to make our own mistakes because we only learn from that, but she’s getting to the point now where she has her friends at college calling me when there’s a challenge or something going on just to kind of talk them through it in a very relaxed and supporting way.  So that’s kind of my proof that I’ve offered a little inspiration to her.

Toni: So it’s through listening, your daughter listening and following your example and so forth that you believe that that’s where the inspiration goes.

Karen: Yes.

Toni: So what about in professional life?  Do you believe that there’s people that you’ve inspired along the way?

Karen: Oh, yeah.  As I said before, I’m a life coach, so just from my coaching practice I have seen so many things happen, and what happens … I mean, these people are doing it on their own, but it’s just pulling out what is best in them that they don’t see.   I feel that that’s an inspiration; just talking things through, having people say some things out loud, and just listening on my end — whether it’s through my business or friends or family –  just listening.  And so often people figure it out on their own, just saying it out loud and just knowing that they have an ear.

Toni: Right, right.

Karen: So it kind of happens day in and day out throughout.  I am such a people believer.  There’s something very, very special about everyone, and sometimes you gotta look a little bit to find that.  It can take a little patience, but everybody has something to offer.  And unfortunately when you look at yourself, very often that just gets pushed down a little bit, and it’s just bringing that out and, in turn, that is inspirational for me as well.

Toni: What do you think you do to help explore the potential in others?

Karen: Well, you know, sometimes it’s listing and naming all the good things about a person, about a challenge, about a thing — whatever is bothering them or worrying them — and then just bringing it into perspective.  And what I like to do … through all the years of experience and my making mistakes and learning finally has come wisdom.  It’s taking a bird’s eye view of a situation and bringing it down to baby steps and looking at it — even if it’s a day or two later than when something happens so that the emotion is out of it, the anger is out of it, whatever it is that you’re feeling, and seeing it for what it is — and then breaking it down and taking things into baby steps so that you see “Oh my gosh, I can do something about this, and I don’t have to do it all at once.”  Go on …

Toni: No, no, no … so I’m hearing that as far as exploring potential in others that it’s almost like you allow people to put a name to what’s troubling them, to be able to say it out loud, put it out there, put a name to it, describe it so that unraveling can begin.

Karen: Exactly.  You know, it all comes down to just knowing your gut and trusting yourself and allowing yourself to trust yourself and giving yourself permission to do that.  I mean, we all have choices and discovering what those facts … lay out the facts.  Now you can make a choice whether or not you want to do something about what’s laying in front of you.

I read a very interesting article just the other day about happiness, and a psychologist has written an article about a happiness set point.  I don’t know if you’ve heard of it, but it’s so intriguing to me because what he says is that 50% of our happiness is genetic.  We just get what we get — 10% is conditional – it’s life.  Life happens, up and down, stuff happens.

But the other 40% is totally and completely controlled by us, each and every one of us.  You have 40% of your happiness, and you can decide what you want to do with that.  Do you want to be happy or don’t you?  Do you want to look at things positively or not?  Do you want to seize the opportunity?  Do you want to look for the little things that happen?  And that, to me, just laid the whole … puts everything in perspective.  We’ve got 40% that we can work with.

Toni: That’s pretty good – that’s a pretty good percentage, isn’t it?

Karen: Yes it is, yes it is.

Toni: Well, so Karen, what do you need to be inspired?

Karen: You know what inspires me, Toni?  All the little things.  All the little tiny … you know, someone opening a door for me because my hands are full or someone smiling or seeing someone help someone else.  Just any little bit of support helping anybody is such a good feeling.

And I could be having a down day, and you go out and someone just does something so small, and that person has no idea how they just brightened your day.  And I remember that going into every day.  I remember that, and I try to do that.  I try and instill that in my kids to do that but, again, it comes from all these years of experience which have turned into wisdom, so …

Toni: And I heard the word kindness.  I mean, that’s the way that you’ve … that’s the word that I believe you defined that inspires you, which are those little things and people doing things for each other, and so it’s the acts of kindness that seem to really inspire you.

Karen: Absolutely.  By one another; just seeing it from one another and the amount of support that we can give one another just through that just amazes me every day.

Toni: Are there tools or methods that you tend to reach for when you know oh man, you know, “It’s time for me to fill myself up; I can feel it, I can use a little inspiration right now”?

Karen: Yeah, yeah.  Long walks.  Some inspirational readings.  I have something that I read from time to time.  Friendships.  Friendship, girls night out, anything to do with friendship and support.  I think that is so very, very important that we need to have an outside support system, women and men.  And unfortunately, not too many men do that, but I gain so much energy and laughter from my friends.

And all of a sudden what I was maybe really kind of worrying about or needed a boost in something or know that there’s something else out there – what is it?  All of a sudden I feel a little bit more light, and the next day my proof might be right in front of me, and there it is.

So definitely friendships, time alone, a little soul searching, being honest with myself, writing things down, and the ultimate — and I’ve done this — is heading to the ocean because the ocean never stops changing and it’s a crude, rude, sweet reminder that life is always changing and roll with it.

Think of ways that we can make it work for us.  Instead of yearning for the past — what was — it isn’t anymore, so we just need to look at things a little differently; and that is always a huge reminder for me.

Toni: So how do you continue to explore your own potential so that you can continue to do the work that you do or to be inspired the way that you are?  What is it that you need to do to explore that potential?

Karen: You know, very often it’s just being around other people.  Coaching clients, I have learned so much from them, maybe sometimes even more.  I’m learning more from them than they’re even learning from me, or that they have no idea what they’re sharing with me.  That can take me by leaps and bounds.  The little things, again.

It’s being open to something like “Oh, I never thought of that, and I need to.”  It brightens up the moment.  It brightens up the next day.  Being aware that any door can open, and even if it’s ajar –and it probably will never be more than ajar, because it’s up to us to push it open and walk through.

Stepping out of that comfort zone is always difficult, but it’s the only way we grow.  So I will make a list of things that I need to change for me and then, like in little baby steps, decide how I’m going to do that and then do everything I can to do that.  So I don’t know if I even answered your question there.

Toni: No, you did.

Karen: There are so many things that pull together that inspire me.

Toni: Well I think you did a really good job at putting that in perspective, that what inspires you are these random acts of kindness –s or not even random — but the acts of kindness and then how you take care of yourself with the long walks and the readings that you do, but also the support system that you put into place and that’s around you.

And that you explore your own potential by again learning from, most likely, the support system that’s around you and learning form the people that you work with.  And I think, you know, that may tie very nicely back to how you explore potential in others which is helping them, as well, using your wisdom, your experience that you’ve gained from this support system to give permission to others to deal with the facts and move forward.  I think … that’s what I heard you say.

Karen: That’s very good.  I’m so glad that you heard … I guess to kind of … there’s a few things that I tell the kids, I tell friends, when it comes to it — although never quite always in this order — but you know, there’s always something special in someone, and there’s always two sides to every story and you owe it to yourself and to whoever that you’re listening to to know that and to learn that.

Trust your gut.  Your happiness is up to you.  You choose to do with it what you want, and if you choose not to be happy, then that’s on you – it’s no one else’s fault.

Toni: Well I think you said it brilliantly at the very beginning of the interview which is that you are a people believer and that is what you’re trying to … the message that you’re trying to teach your children as well is to be a people believer, and that’s awesome.

Karen, you’ve given a lot of insight into such a short amount of time for this interview, and people that are reading and listening to these interviews from all over the world … some of the interviews people will go “Yeah, I can relate to that” or “Wow, I’m going to try that”, and that’s been what you’ve been part of today.  And for that and everyone here at the Get Inspired! Project, we thank you so much for being part of this today.

Karen: Well, thank you so much.  I enjoyed talking with you.

___________________________________________________________

For more information about Karen Kramer:  www.AllAboutPossibilities.com

.

.



.
Right click here to download…
.

Toni Reece: Thank you, Shayla, so much for agreeing to do this interview, and before we jump into the questions, can you please introduce yourself and tell us what you do?

Shayla Roberts: Sure.  I’m Shayla Roberts, and I work with clients all over the globe by helping them to build business and maintain work/life balance.

Toni: Great.  Thank you.  The very first question that I wanted to ask you, which falls nicely in line with your introduction, is who do you inspire, and how do you go about that?

Shayla: Well, I inspire my clients; certainly, that is a big part of my job, and one of the ways that I go about it is being really prepared myself, so I actually have a 2- to 3-hour personal practice every morning that puts me in the right state of mind to be working with my clients, particularly in the current climate where there is a tremendous amount of uncertainty and confusion.  So I really take it seriously, and that puts me in what I call an optimal operating state, which really helps me hold my clients in the possibility of also being in that optimal state.

And then, actually hands-on how I do it is I work by phone with clients and really focus on their state of being, regardless of what business they are in.  It’s anything that is running around in their brain as an issue or a problem, I help them really work through it — not so much from giving advice, but from a place of helping them really see their own solutions and believe in their own intuition.  I think that is one of the biggest things that I do, is help people really listen to their own wisdom and then act on it powerfully.  That is a little different than a coach who is very directive, but that is my approach.

Toni: When you do this, and I really like that phrase, the optimal operating state that you get yourself into because I would imagine that that then transfers to your client to get them into that optimal operating state, which would be … is that the ultimate goal for them?

Shayla: You know, it is.  If there is a simple way to put it, I would say that it is, and then to also have them moving from a place of absolute alignment with their internal goals and values and their passions, sense of purpose, to really focus that back down.  We live in a world where so many of the moves we make are ignited by things outside of ourselves, and particularly in reaction to things that come at us from the external world.  And when I experience my clients doing that, I really help them move back to … okay, you know, if it’s just you and you’re aligning to what you really believe in and what you know is right for you, how would your choice be different?

Toni: And that is the inspiration as far as focusing on their state of being, but realizing their sense of purpose?

Shayla: Absolutely.  And values.  Very, very important.

Toni: And values, did you say, as well?

Shayla: Yes.  One of the things we’re knowing in this current state — particularly people who are in the workforce — is that most of the unhappiness out there comes from a misalignment of values.  In other words, people are working in environments that they don’t really relate to from their internal sense of what is right or what is appropriate for them.  So for me, it’s fundamental in creating right livelihood and right living to really be looking at how we function when we’re values based.

Toni: And when you do that as part of the inspiration journey that you go on with your clients, how do you explore their potential, the potential of getting to that sense of purpose and their passion?  How does that happen?

Shayla: Well, it begins with very careful listening, and people very often are not in touch with their own potential.  They don’t really know what they want very often because we are all so schooled in learning to fit in in our formative years.  And the work that I do is really about reintroducing my clients to their authentic selves; and once that begins to happen, then the original sense of passion and purpose that they even had as a kid begins to come back in and memory re-emerges, and I have designed a number of tools to actually help with this.  But, it’s an exploration; it’s about holding the space for possibility thinking, and it’s about helping them source their own potential in a fresh way, in a way that for most people is “Oh my gosh, you know, I had forgotten completely that I just love that activity or that focus.”

Toni: Can you clarify one thing for me, Shayla, that I had written myself a note here?  The words that you said were “holding a space.”  Can you tell me what that means?

Shayla: Yes.  You know what, I think maybe a good way to think about it metaphorically is the idea that in indigenous cultures it takes a village to raise a child, and we know that phrase from Hillary Clinton.  But the idea behind that is that we learn who we are from telling our story; that is how we learn who we are, because then we see ourselves in the reactions of the people around us.  So in a way, those people in the village are just being there; they’re just holding the space for that communication to come forth.  And of course, in coaching it’s not totally passive in the way that it might be if you were just listening to someone’s story, because there is also gentle questioning to take a story deeper and to also fill the story out more robustly.

Toni: Thank you very, very much for that; that was awesome.  Shayla, what do you need for inspiration?  Where do you seek inspiration?

Shayla: Well, I am very much in the creativity game.  I came into my adult years as a musician — actually a professional musician for a while — as an artist, a fine artist, and I continue to go to those sources, to creativity-based sources.  This week, I will be going to Fashion Week here in Phoenix.  It’s not because I’m someone who is a fashion maven, but because I know I will be surrounded by really artistic, creative people.  And the week after that, I will be going to Phoenix Design Week for the same reason; I will be wandering around talking to designers and ad agencies, really just for the fun of mixing it up with creative people.  Because creativity, and our reemerging, our reawakening to our creativity is also a big part of the work that I do.  I mean, trusting who we are as I mentioned before, listening to our own wisdom, is all about listening to when it’s okay that we color outside of the lines, and so I like to get into the creative world.  And then also I have a very rich inner world.  I’m kind of an inveterate introvert, so I love some internal processes.  I do practice yoga, and I do a meditational walk every morning in the desert, and I also play music every morning in kind of a meditative way, not in a performance kind of way.

Toni: So you really do look for inspiration in sources of creativity, and as you said the music and being around like-minded people in design, in fashion, and art, that’s what I’m hearing; so that you can almost funnel that inspiration from them into yourself, is that what I’m hearing?

Shayla: Yeah, it inspires me to be around people.  You know, people who are really involved in creative works are risk takers, whether they are artists or musicians or even graphic designers.  They are risk takers because they never know for sure whether their creations are going to be accepted, and I think that risk-taking is a really potent remedy for lack of inspiration.  It’s like, when we’re willing to open up a little bit more, be a little more risk friendly in the world, not from the standpoint of being reckless, but just from being a little more bold.

Toni: And when you are looking to explore your own potential and take it further, what do you do?  What do you search for?  What do you use?

Shayla: Well, it’s interesting.  I sort of like coincidence as a way of opening to new ideas.  For instance, my trip to Fashion Design Week here in Phoenix happened out of flipping through a women’s magazine — a local glossy, beautiful women’s magazine — and just closing my eyes, opening to a page and pointing to see what would inspire me.   And what I pointed to was a full page spread of a gorgeous model, and it didn’t quite fit for me because I’m not real image conscious, you know, it’s not this sort of thing that I look at fashion from a place of “Oh, I have to conform to the fashion of the day.”  So I was curious about it, and I decided to read the article, and that article led me to the discovery that Fashion Week was happening this week.  So it felt like, “Ahhh, well that would be really, really fun for me.”  I love beautiful clothes.  I love exceptional design of any kind, but particularly fashion design, even though I don’t feel obliged to always have the latest bag myself; I appreciate it.  So there is a lot of that, of looking in unexpected places.

I’ve been doing an interesting thing on my morning walk.  Part of my walk is on the desert, and I come back along a golf course path, and it’s just a beautiful combination of kind of natural land and cultured land.  And I started kind of noticing golf balls along the way, so I began picking them up just for fun, and all of a sudden started realizing that we had piles and piles of golf balls, but they were always along the trail on the golf side.  And then I started looking in the desert.  I had never looked over there before, and it’s quite a ways away from the course, so I hadn’t thought there would be golf balls there, but now almost every morning just because I’m willing to sort of follow my nose and follow my intuition, I’ll find a golf ball out in the middle of the desert.  That is a way that I explore my own life, is by getting off the beaten path by trying unexpected things in sort of expected places, or vice versa, and it’s just kind of keeping life fresh in that way.

Toni: It’s interesting, I’m hearing that you’re saying that you’re a big believer in following the coincidence, but yet it’s not the obvious coincidence.  You take it even further to see where that is going to take you.  The magazine ad that was the model but then led you to the discovery of Fashion Week to the obvious golf balls to the balls in the desert.  So that’s really interesting to look further.  And what I’m hearing you say as far as correlating this with what you need for inspiration and how you explore your potential, definitely ties back to them how you use that with others … that you focus on their state of being and helping them discover the possibilities, because they may not see that obvious, and so you’re taking them down that path of discovery to look for that invisible obvious.  And so the same thing that you’re doing to explore your own potential definitely seems to be transferring into exploring other people’s potential.

Shayla: Well, it is, and in fact, for about the last 15 years … I think I’ve shared with you personally about the Bold Moves work that we have been developing, and that’s been a creation.  It’s been a creation of a curriculum that actually is online and will help people.  It will inspire people to know themselves in a different way and also to think differently as they go through their day, to be open to different ways of seeing their experience.  And so I’m very inspired by creating things, creating stuff.  I just love that, whether it’s music or whether it’s art.  I’ve done tons of graphic design over the years myself for various business projects, and then the creation of curriculums and programs that are a little more structured than what I do as a one-on-one coach.

Toni: Well, Shayla, I can tell you I am so grateful for the snapshot that you have given of your approaches to inspiring others and exploring their potential, but also what you need to stay inspired and to explore your own potential, and how those two are really connected.  And the snapshot you have provided people will learn from and benefit from, and so I thank you so very much for taking part of this project and helping us with this information.

Shayla: Oh, Toni, it has been absolutely my pleasure.  I think that your vision with this project is just wonderful, and it’s just a delight to participate.

Toni: Thank you very, very much, Shayla, and hopefully we will talk soon.

___________________________________________________________

For more information about Shayla Roberts:  www.boldmovesblog.com

.