Day 315: Karey Thorne
“… when I can wake up this state of loving inside of me, it’s like I’m just loving and blessing everything. It’s like “Whoa, that rose!” or “Wow, that cloud!” or “Oh, this face in front of me!” or “Oh, that student!” It’s like I see the beauty in everything when I have love awakened inside of me.”
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Toni Reece: Thank you so much, Karey, for agreeing to be part of this Project, and before we begin, can you please introduce yourself?
Karey Thorne: You mean a little bit about me?
Toni: Absolutely.
Karey: Okay. Well, let’s see. I have a background in counseling, so everything kind of stems from that, and then I taught for a number of years in high schools, a class called Peace Jam or Peace Studies, which was very much looking at how do you do life, and cause and effect, and that sort of thing. And what I’m doing presently is – I did a lot of service learning when I did that also, so a lot of service projects that would be integrated into curriculum and things like that.
But what I do at the moment is I have a nonprofit called Heart to Hands, and it’s basically a leadership class for ages 16 to about 30. And I go to 30 because I’ve had so many students from the past who are like “I want to take that class, I want to take that class.” So they’ve just kind of … I have a whole group of students who’ve kind of continued with me from their high school years, and so that’s why I go up into that age group.
And so anyway, so we meet quite regularly, and then we do service projects, and those service projects can be internationally or they can be locally, and it sort of ties into what we do in leadership is look at everything that disturbs you externally is a reflection of unresolved things inside of you internally. So how do you learn tools to begin to resolve these things inside of yourself? And then we use the service projects to go out and try it on, like “How does this work? Where are you challenged with this? How do you work with it?”
Toni: Oh, that’s fantastic, and it’s a great lead-in to the first question, which is, when you think about inspiration, who do you inspire, and how does it happen?
Karey: Well, I would say I inspire … I inspire a lot of people, but I particularly seem to be able to inspire this age group. I work pretty well with high school … well, with young adults I would say is kind of my … that’s where I focus, I think probably because it’s most interesting to me.
And how I inspire them … I think … I think it’s really through seeing their potential and respecting them, you know, listening deeply to them and really being like “Wow, I see who you are.” You know, it’s like deeply seeing them, and then in that reflection, they start to see themselves and start to see themselves in a deeper capacity.
There’s a whole lifting that starts to happen with that, and I think at the base of it, it’s seeing the beauty and the potential inside of humanity, inside of them, and them seeing that that seeing kind of wakes it up inside of them.
And so it’s kind of … it’s kind of a … I think it’s a … I don’t quite know how it works, except for that it does, and I know that it comes out of loving and respecting and hearing them, and then probably growing the conversation, you know, like lifting the conversation, like “Oh yeah, this” and “Oh yeah, this” and then the conversation continues to lift. And in that, everybody walks away inspired, including me.
Toni: So how do you think then that this helps them to explore their potential?
Karey: I think it starts to awaken them to themselves. I think somebody seeing them and valuing them and hearing them starts to cause them to say “Well, what is going on inside of me?” and “Oh, I didn’t realize that this would be taken seriously” or “I didn’t realize that I had something to offer.”
One of the things I found in working with children over the years is – or young adults – is that really the greatest thing that we have is what we can give. We always look at needing to give something … you know, the people that are having the difficult time, they need something, and so we should give them something.
I found that actually the deeper truth is if you can find a place where they can give something to somebody else, then they start to come alive. They start to find their value. They intrinsically know that they have value to another, and I think that’s just so core to being a human being that I think I seem to … that seems to be what starts to happen is they realize that they have a gift that they can give to others. And the more truthful and authentic they become inside of themselves, the more real their life starts becoming and the more they start affecting others, and so then they become inspired.
So it’s like … it’s like waking up the gifts that are inside of them, you know? And there are different things for every single human being, but I think at the base of it it’s this … it’s this seeing of another, you know, and recognizing and honoring that. I think that’s probably the core of it.
Toni: It’s interesting, because there are certain words that come out for me when I’m doing these interviews with people, and I wrote down the word experience, and the experience is almost … it’s happening in almost a 360 kind of way. That’s what I’m hearing you describe. It’s your experience that you’re using to help awaken the experience of the kids or the young adults – they’re having an experience, and they’re paying that forward in the service.
Karey: Exactly.
Toni: And so that’s pretty cool, the way that’s happening.
Karey: Yeah, yeah, yeah … no, that’s a nice way of putting that. It’s like … it’s like waking people up. It’s waking them up to themselves and getting them excited about themselves, because they see that somebody else sees them.
Toni: So what inspires you?
Karey: Oh, goodness. Beauty really inspires me. Nature; you know, a sunset, clouds, that kind of thing. Truth. Truth is really big for me, because it like moves me deeply when I do that. The resiliency of the human spirit, just the depth that’s actually in us. And when I watch somebody in a difficult situation and how they come forward with a new understanding, that’s just so exciting.
Or I guess the other thing would be is when things connect. You know, like when you’re in a classroom and you’re going … it’s like when you see two minds come together and connect or two beings come together and connect, and there’s like an “ah-ha” moment, you know, and everybody goes “Whoa!” and then you’re off to the next one. Those connection places are really inspiring for me. I love to … it’s like a crescendo. It’s like “Ooh, we hit it!” Then we just keep going. We just kind of keep lifting. So for me, those are the really inspiring times.
Toni: When you reach a day that you may seek for inspiration more than the previous day — or it could be an hour, you know, of the day, but you’re looking for inspiration — are there go-to resources, tools, that you tend to reach for on a consistent basis?
Karey: Yeah. For me, it’s really when I’m in my loving. That’s the key for me. When I’m connected and I’m in my loving, everything’s exquisite, and it’s like probably inspiration happens all around me all the time.
So for me, the things that I do to get there are I’ve got a whole set of books that I read that I, you know … kind of just like every night I’ll read something, you know, about that that just inspires me and lifts me, that reminds me of truth.
I’ll go for a walk. I’ll meditate. I meditate every day. That’s a really consistent practice, and that’s just like my gift to myself. And I’ll pray, too. I really will. I’ll walk and I’ll pray and I’m like … just get in this great state of loving, and it’s pretty magnificent. So for me it’s getting connected to the loving.
Toni: Can you define that? Before … I love the way you said here’s how I get to it, but for those of us who may have a different definition of that, what’s your definition of “I’ve got to get to the loving”?
Karey: Well, it’s like, I think ultimately that’s what we are is love, ultimately, and so it’s like, when I can wake up this state of loving inside of me, it’s like I’m just loving and blessing everything. It’s like “Whoa, that rose!” or “Wow, that cloud!” or “Oh, this face in front of me!” or “Oh, that student!” It’s like I see the beauty in everything when I have love awakened inside of me.
It’s kind of a mysterious thing. It’s like … it’s something that I have to remind myself of. It’s something that I know lives in the heart, you know? I know that’s where it generates from, basically, but it’s this state of just seeing everything in beauty. It’s like everything is just, wow … it’s like a state of being and it’s like I love everything. I love everything when I’m in that state, and there isn’t anything that comes in front of me that I can’t love when I’m in that state.
Now of course, I’m not always in that state, so for me, it’s if I can live in that state, then, oh, there’s just … it’s exquisite. But it’s kind of hard to describe, now that you ask me. It’s kind of like, well, how would you talk about that?
Toni: Well, it’s so important. It’s a key component of where you draw inspiration from.
Karey: Yeah.
Toni: There have been many, many ways of describing the state that you’ve described and you’ve labeled it as a state of loving, and it’s just … it’s fascinating to hear the different definitions of that, and I’m wondering if it’s hard work to stay in it?
Karey: Actually, it’s really easy when you’re in it. You know, another word for it would be like living love. It’s just alive inside of you. It’s just alive inside of you, and the more you’re in it, the more it generates more of it, you know? It’s like it’s a self-generating state in a way. What did you ask me?
Toni: Are we out of it now? Is it hard to stay in it? That’s what it was.
Karey: Right. When I’m in it, it’s really easy to stay in it, and I find that the trigger points where I get taken out of it is like if I go into judgment about something, if I become critical of something, if I think something shouldn’t be a certain way. Those are the places where I know I exit it. Of course, I don’t realize that I’ve exited it, you know, initially, but it’s almost like being in a state of acceptance, I find, that then I can be in a state of loving.
In other words, if I just accept reality the way it is, I’m in great shape. It’s only when I start to, you know, have a little argument about that, like, “Well, it shouldn’t be that way” that I then step out it.
Toni: So what are you doing now to explore your own potential so that you can live the life that you want to live and do the work that you want to do? What do you do to explore that potential?
Karey: Boy … you know for me … this is going to sound really strange, but it’s like I continue to surrender. It’s like surrendering, it’s like letting go of my ideas about how it should be, and like letting kind of like a bigger sense of what it is kind of overcome me. And that surrender can be really scary at times, you know, because it’s like how you know yourself. And so, it’s like … it’s like, who are we if we give up those definitions, you know? Who are we if we really start to give up those points of how we’ve known ourselves?
Toni: Is that what you believe has to happen in order to explore your potential? You have to surrender that?
Karey: In a funny way, I think yes, because I think there’s … see, I look that there’s a … like there’s a … there’s something, there’s a mystery yet that I still don’t understand that I’m walking into. If I try and control it with my mind, I’m trying to manipulate it and make it a certain way, because you know, I think the outcome should be this way, then I’m kind of out of that state. Whereas if I surrender, and it’s like I just let the next reality open up in front of me, then I’m in an unknown space.
So for me, it’s been a funny thing. It’s like almost giving up control. Like, I really don’t know. And so, more and more … oddly enough, more and more of myself shows up as I surrender, so it sounds really strange.
Toni: No, no, it doesn’t. I just want to clarify. So it’s really not surrendering your destiny; it’s surrendering the control that you have over it.
Karey: Right; that I have any idea what that is.
Toni: Right, okay. And so, do you seek any type of resources? Do you educate yourself in areas? What do you do so that … it’s almost like, I’m thinking, if it were me, which I love this, but if it were me, I’d be going “Okay, well maybe I need to learn a lot about a little, or a little about a lot, so that I’m ready when it comes. I mean, I want to be ready just in case.”
Karey: You know, it’s funny. I’ve almost had to give up not knowing to pursue this. It’s like, I don’t know, you know? And I think maybe that’s what’s exciting about the work that I do and the world that I live in, is that I don’t walk in with a lot of ideas about where something’s going to go. I let it kind of inform me. And so every single class I’ve ever taught, every single group I’ve ever done, it’s completely different because of who’s there, and they kind of create … it’s all created together. I don’t really understand what it’s going to be, you know?
So I don’t go in with like a prescribed idea. You know, I may have a sense of “Well, it went this way last time and it went this way this time” but I mean, it’s like a new creation each time, and I kind of like that. I kind of like that, because it’s very adventuresome. It’s a little risky. It’s a little scary, you know, but the beauty that comes out of that, I’ve really begun to trust, you know? So it’s like, just step up and be 100% present there, and see what happens.
Toni: And what a wonderful gift then that you transfer to the students that you work with, because you’re experiencing the same thing you’re asking them to do.
Karey: Exactly, exactly. So it’s really … if I were to look at it, my focus would be transformational learning or education. It’s like, how do you do that? How do you just trust that just as you’ve become deeper and deeper inside of yourself, that the perfect right thing comes out of your mouth, the perfect right situation arises, you know, that you can begin to … you can begin to live in that sort of state. It’s pretty interesting. It really inspires kids, because I’m not telling them what to do. I’m like “Let it wake up inside of you, and then you live from that place.”
Toni: Well, Karey, your interview has been wonderful, and it’s been filled with a lot of insight and laughter and great value, and we thank you so very much for taking your time to be part of the Get Inspired! Project. And we will have a link at the bottom of the transcript as far as how people can see what you do and learn a little bit more about you, but for showing up today, we cannot thank you enough.
Karey: Thank you for doing this project. It’s very inspirational.
Toni: Well you are quite welcome. Take care of yourself. It’s been a pleasure.
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For more information about Karey Thorne: www.hearttohands.org and www.mystery-school.com
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