Day 266: Rob Horlock

June 23, 2010 at 12:01 am, Category: Inspiration

“I’m inspired by a lot of what happens in nature, and some of the blogs that I’ve written have actually been inspired by things that I’ve seen while doing walks in the Forest or just observed kind of in the natural world.  So that kind of helps me to explore my potential.”

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Toni Reece: Thank you so much, Rob, for agreeing to be part of this Project, and before we begin, can you please introduce yourself?

Rob Horlock: Yes, hello Toni.  My name is Rob Horlock.  I live in the New Forest, which is near Southampton in the UK.  I’m married to Karen, who apart from being a very nice person is one of the best coaches that you’ll ever meet.  I’ve worked in various positions in large companies.  I’ve worked in marketing, sales, project management, IT, and I’m now in the process of setting up a new website called The Mid Life Opportunity, which would be a community website for people in mid life which will offer stimulation, advanced guidance, and support to mid lifers everywhere.

Toni: Well thank you for that.  Rob, when you think about the word inspiration, who do you inspire, and how does that happen?

Rob: Well, I think back to my previous corporate life, I’ve inspired the members of my various teams, or I hope I have.  I’ve certainly tried to lead by example and to assure that they have the tools to manage their own personal development.  I worked for a year in China building up a new team there, and that was an interesting experience.  I worked through an interpreter and different cultures, obviously, since what seemed obvious to them didn’t seem obvious to me, and vice versa.

I hope I inspire some of the people around me as well.  I’m a fairly sort of an open book type of person – what you see is what you get.  I’m always ready to offer advice and guidance; whether it’s always accepted or not is another matter, of course.

Toni: So when I’m in engagement with you, what happens?  You said that you have helped a lot of people with personal development, whether it was in your career or personally.  So what happens?  What goes on between you and I that you’re going to inspire me to do my best?

Rob: Well, I would first of all try and find out what motivates you, try and understand what turns you on, try and understand what makes you tick.  We’d be looking at where you’re strong and where you’ve got development areas, try and make sure that you understand those, and build on the strengths that you have and the motivations that you’ve got.

Toni: And you are now creating a site for people that are mid life and struggling with certain issues, correct?

Rob: Yes I am, yes.  That’s right.  Yes.

Toni: So how will this site then help people to explore their potential?  Do you think it will?

Rob: Well, I think it will certainly help them to recognize what we call the self-imposed limitations that they might have.  A lot of people have issues in their lives, whether it’s in relationships, whether it’s in career, financial, health, and these weigh very heavily on people.  I think with assistance, people can look at their issues, understand them better, and really get to grips with what they can do themselves and what they can get outside help with to help them to move forward.  It’s really an understanding process, I guess, as much as anything, and an acceptance process.

Toni: Right, right.  And I would imagine creating a community for people to be helped through these issues, either by their peers or by professionals, is going to be a great way to maybe sit there and say “Hey, I’m not alone.”

Rob: Yes, absolutely, Toni.  You hit the nail on the head there.  They’re not alone.  And some people realize they’re not alone, of course, but a lot of people think they’re they only person in the world with their particular problem or that their particular problem is worse than everybody else’s, and of course it’s not.  Lots of other people have got exactly the same problem; lots of other people have had exactly the same problems and overcome them.  So bringing people together in a community with coaches to supervise means that people can realize that they’re not alone and can hopefully move forward with some hope of improvement in their lives.

Toni: So Rob, what inspires you?

Rob: What inspires me?  I like learning things.  I like meeting new people, either face to face or online as we’ve just met, and I’m inspired by setting up The Mid Life Opportunity.  In the course of doing this, I’ve been recruiting plenty of coaches to provide the support and guidance, and I’ve spoken to a number of coaches that I’ve never met.  I’ve really been quite inspired by the warmth with which people have embraced the idea, and several have given me truly unconditional sorts of help — providing content or helping me to organize the website — which has been inspirational.  It’s also been very pleasing for me to think that, you know, other people would help without me actually asking for help.

What else inspires me?  I live in the New Forest.  I’m a country person, not a city person, so nature inspires me.  I love all the seasons, but I particularly like this time of year which where I am now is early summer.  The sun always helps.  The sun shined today, and that always inspires me.

Success inspires me, too.  Doing something right is a great feeling, and helping somebody else to get something right is an inspiration, too.  So there are a number of things, really.

Toni: And what brought you to this place, Rob, where you wanted to create a community to help other people either discuss their issues or find the support that they need to help them along the way?  How did you get here?

Rob: It was probably personal experience.  I was myself looking for a job some time ago, and I felt that the helping support of somebody like me who reaches mid life was really poor, to be honest, whether it’s government support or private support.  I did not feel that I was getting a huge amount of help.

My wife, as I said, is a coach.  She does a lot of relationship work, and I know that there are a lot of people who’ve got relationship issues.  Some of this is driven by the fact that their partner has lost their job, so they’ve got financial issues, but that rolls into relationship issues.  So I could see that there were lots of people who had issues in various parts of their lives, and I’m trying to pull it together for those people in mid life, because at the moment I can certainly … in the UK where I am, that area is not really supported enough, so I think there’s an area there where we can help … help to develop, and help people through doing that.

Toni: So really, it’s born from your own personal experience and how you felt based on your own issues, that you can only imagine that there’s other people that may be experiencing the same, so you felt that need and you did something about it.

Rob: Yes, absolutely.  I’m convinced that there is an opportunity there to help people.  The trick, of course, will be making sure that the people know we exist, and they’re happy to come along and be helped, because not everybody is happy to be helped.  Some people are only happy if they’re unhappy.

Toni: Absolutely.  I don’t think those people would probably come to your site.

Rob: No, I don’t think they will, no.

Toni: So Rob, what do you tend to reach for on a consistent basis when you’re looking for inspiration?  Are there tools or resources that are your go-to tools and resources when you’re looking to be filled up a bit?

Rob: Well, there’s a wonderful thing called the internet of course, of which I spend far too much of my time on, which is packed full of helpful advice for everything, as we know.  So the internet is my tool of choice.  Also, asking experts.  I’ve known a number of people who are in that mid life opportunity.  I know a number of people in the various areas who are experts in their fields who I would turn to, and they of course know other people who can pass me on if necessary.  So it’s really a question of asking those people who know best; and the social media, I guess.

Toni: The final question on the Project is, how do you continue to explore your own potential so that you can help these people and put these resources together?

Rob: I’m somebody who likes to be liked and respected, I suppose.  So positive feedback from people around me helps, so I do hope that once we take off The Mid Life Opportunity, that I will begin to have some successes and we do get some positive feedback.

I mentioned nature earlier.  I’m inspired by a lot of what happens in nature, and some of the blogs that I’ve written have actually been inspired by things that I’ve seen while doing walks in the Forest or just observed kind of in the natural world.  So that kind of helps me to explore my potential.

There’s lots of things I’d like to achieve, but like everyone else there’s a balance.  It’s a balance between,  apparently, what I think I’m capable of achieving and what I need to do to keep a roof over my head and those kinds of things, so I guess I’m like everybody else.   It’s always going to be conflicting issues which impinge upon how far I will develop my potential, but certainly I’ve seen … at the moment I see The Mid Life Opportunity as an area that I can help other people and expand my own horizons, if you like, at the same time.

Toni: It’s interesting that the point that you’re at now as far as making the statement about balance, and the capability balance versus the financial risk that you have to take, and so I would hope that as your website takes off and your community grows, that you will find that balance, and then be able to teach people how to have that balance for themselves as well.  I wish you the greatest success with this opportunity, and thank you tremendously for sharing it with us on the Get Inspired! Project.

Rob: Thank you very much, Toni, for giving me the opportunity to chat with you about it.

Toni: You’re quite welcome, and we will have a link at the bottom of your transcript on how people can check you out, and I know that you’re launching at the end of the summer, correct?

Rob: Correct, yes.  Hopefully, by the end of August.

Toni: Well good luck to you.

Rob: There is actually a holding page on the website at the moment, and I’ll send you the link.

Toni: Fantastic.  And good luck to you, Rob, and thank you for joining us today.

Rob: Thank you, Toni.

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For more information about Rob Horlock:  www.midlifeop.com, midlifeop.blogspot.com

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THUMBNAIL PHOTO OF NEW FOREST:  Dave Porter
As published in The Guardian, UK