Day 20: Maia Berens

October 20, 2009 at 12:01 am, Category: Inspiration

“… awareness expands if you keep staying honest with who you are and being in places with like-minded people and all that, then that’s what happens.  My awareness has expanded tremendously.  I don’t think I can put a lot over on myself.”

.



.
Right click here to download…
.

Toni Reece: We Thank you so very much for agreeing to participate in this project, and before we begin with the questions, could you please take a couple of seconds and introduce yourself?

Maia Berens: Yes.  My name is Maia Berens, and I call myself a life coach because it’s a commonly accepted way of identifying myself, but I’d probably have to come up with some other name that has intuitive in it, but I have never been able to figure out what that is.

Toni: Okay, okay, well thank you for that.  Maia, we’re going to start with the very first question, which is with the work that you do or even in personal relationships, who would you say that you inspire and how do you do that?

Maia: That’s really interesting.  I think in a way you’ve started with the hardest first.  Who I inspire?  I do believe that I actually do inspire my family, which are four adult children and a variety of partners, and also clients by virtue of the transformation and gigantic changes that I’ve made in my life, and the way that I actually live my life.  I’m very committed to have my authentic self be both inside and outside me.

Toni: When you say that the major transference that you have been through and the life changes in your life — that that is part of how you inspire others — can you give us an example of that?

Maia: Yes, absolutely.  The quick example is my first marriage at age 22 with no self-esteem and marrying somebody who I didn’t really love but I was afraid not to because then nobody might want me.  So you can imagine how that went, and it lasted 15 years and four children.  The second one was fast — six months — because I had some self-esteem and I realized that I just didn’t know what a marriage is or could be.  And then I got married in 1986, which I have been for 23 years, and my husband and I — it’s both our third marriages — and we have the best relationship I know.  So, it’s huge.  It’s such a huge transformation in the same lifetime.

Toni: And so all of those experiences that you went through with your life changes and the different changes that you went through, how does that help you to inspire others?

Maia: Well, I consider myself this example of if I can do it, then you can, too.

Toni: I see.

Maia: And besides that, I do have the ability to talk about it and teach about it and share my wisdom; and of course it’s very different with my family than it is with clients.  With clients, they pay me for that; with family they’re adults, and I totally wait to be asked, but they were along the whole time that was happening; these are my children.  They lived with their dad, who they still have a good relationship with, and I have a friendly relationship with — sort of extended family kind of thing — and they have lived in the house with my husband, their stepdad, and they’ve experienced the difference.  They’ve experienced what that’s like; my clients, I have to tell them about it.

Toni: So the life experiences that your children have experienced with you … you use those experiences to help inspire them because they’ve lived it; but your clients you use those experiences to say “Look, I’ve been here, here’s how I can help.”

Maia: That’s exactly right, and I happen to be, fortunately, I guess … just for what I do I’m very comfortable; I don’t really care if I talk about that stuff; some people feel real uncomfortable about it.  I don’t.

Toni: Hmmm … how do you … when you’re working with other people or even your relationships, Maia, how do you explore the potential in others?

Maia: Gosh.  I think you’ve been sent by God as a messenger … I’m kidding.  That’s really funny that you should ask me that because I’m in the process of writing some copy for my website, and I have to talk about something that is hard to talk about.  The way I explore what’s going on is extremely intuitively.  It’s almost like I have an intuitive plug into them — I mean, if they allow — it’s not like I walk around doing that with people, but it’s just a gift I seem to have and, of course, it’s not a real plugging in, it’s just that I get an intuitive sense very readily of where their blocks are.  Even though they may be showing up in one way in their life by certain things that aren’t working right, I seem to have a pretty uncanny awareness of where it stems from, so I can kind of help them direct what they have to look at.  And, of course, I can be wrong, so then that’s for them to say.

Toni: How do you go about that with the intuition that you use and the awareness that you’re trying to bring them to?  Is there a technique that you use?  Is there a particular skill that you use that takes you right to that intuitiveness?

Maia: I think it’s a gift.  I mean, I think, you know, we all have creative gifts, and this is a creative gift that I have.  I mean, I write, and I certainly can write the way I speak — it’s clearly — but you’re never gonna put me up for a prize about it.  I write clearly, and I know how to keep my personality in it, but this is not something like that; this is like the ability to be some kind of an incredible singer or something.  That’s what it feels like to me.  I don’t know.  It’s just there.

Toni: That’s awesome.  What do you need for inspiration?  How do you seek inspiration to stay inspired?

Maia: Well, many, many people have been very important teachers in my life, including John Gray for — you know, the Men Are From Mars guy — for very, very many years, and it seems more and more in recent years that I become inspired by my own commitment and then seeing it sort of outside myself.  My own commitment to the values that I seem to have committed to without totally realizing it at the beginning of this large transformation of my life in 1980, and that is something like it’s possible for there to be peace on this planet, although I know it doesn’t look that way, and the answer is in the truth, whatever that is, and I always feel this … and it has grown, this awareness that we happen on two levels.

We happen as human beings living this … I mean, I’ve read The Holographic Universe and things and in a way we may just may all not even be more than just … we are sort of compact energy, so it’s all kind of a dream in a way.  Anyway, we live that and then we are also these spiritual beings and I don’t know if it has to do with age; my husband and I have been investigating that since he is going to be 75 next month and I’m 66.  I can’t not realize that I’m mortal, and I think it’s just something that gets, you know, you could say more in your face; and so that sense of purpose, I guess that’s what it comes down to.  I feel this very strong sense of purpose here, and I feel like I’m kind of an example of something and, at the same time, I inspire myself to stay on my own path — because I keep having visions of having the ability to help people more — and also live the experience of what it’s like when you reap the financial rewards of that because I’ve done it other ways that weren’t really connected to my gift … if I’m making any sense at all.

Toni: No, you absolutely are … you absolutely are.  And so, when you think about things that you need to be inspired, the things that you’ve talked about are teachers that have been in your past along the way, and the commitment.  In order for you to stay inspired, you have to stay committed and stay to the truth and your sense of purpose and live by those experiences.  That’s what I’m hearing, that you need to stay inspired.

Maia: I do.  I also need sort of little messages from the universe where I can see … also knowing that there are others like me and of course the internet is an amazing place where I’ve learned that, you know, I literally have a young man in India that I communicate with.  I mean, how does that happen, you know?  And so I’m finding that there are like-minded people everyplace on the planet, so it sort of cements and keeps inspiring me that I … what I’ve sort of discovered as my life’s purpose is valid.  It just gets more and more refined and subtler, I guess.  I mean, because look at, you know, look at the way the planet looks.  It looks pretty challenged, but isn’t that how we as human beings learn?

Toni: Absolutely, and I think that follows very nicely into when you talk about finding like-minded people and people with the same sense of mission and purpose; that inspires you.  How does that also help you continuously explore your own potential?

Maia: Well, what a beautiful question.  I think these questions are very inspired, thank you.  That question, would you say that again?

Toni: Absolutely, absolutely.  You’ve spoken about how things inspire you in finding like-minded people and knowing your purpose and these things that you do to stay inspired.  How do they help you explore your own potential l… take you to that next level?

Maia: Well, by having people in my life who are also willing to tell me the truth and having my defenses down so I can hear them.  My husband is the primary person that does that.  We attempt to do that for each other.  Also, fortunately, I’m not a person tremendously hooked into my ego, so I don’t get huge issues with that.   Some people have a bigger issue with that, not gigantic, although you never know if I become famous it might be, you know what I mean?  I’ve watched it happen; I know John since 1982 when I worked for him when he was famous and all of that, so I watched the challenges that exist for that kind of attention and money and all that.  So, I don’t really know.  But so far, that’s been true, and so I don’t even want to talk about this, but I can’t help it.

You know, if my husband weren’t in my life — which is something that a lot of us say — but now when you get to be our age, you know it’s gonna happen.  One day, one of us isn’t gonna wake up, but I’m gonna have to … I don’t know, I’ll have to hire somebody, I don’t know … I have to have that in my life.  I need to have people who will tell me the truth when I’m off base.  And that’s how … and you know what’s happened over all these years of … awareness expands if you keep staying honest with who you are and being in places with like-minded people and all that, then that’s what happens.  My awareness has expanded tremendously.  I don’t think I can put a lot over on myself.  So I’m looking outside feeling what’s going on inside myself and moving forward like that.

Toni: And with you — I know your husband is a huge resource for you as you’ve stated — are there any resources or tools that you go to and you look for as far as helping you explore your potential in staying inspired?  Any particular tools that you use?

Maia: Well, I do.  In 1982 I learned from John Gray and Barbara De Angelis had to write what they called then — and it’s changed – “love letters,” which are a way to express all feelings; it’s a tool I teach and insist my clients use, pretty much insist, and everything that I’ve picked up along the way.  I have lots of spiritual books.  I have lots of self-help books.  Self-help books I don’t feel attracted to.  Spiritual books … mostly I pick up ones that I’ve used before and, I don’t know, just feel moved in the moment or something.  You know, the thing is for me, in a way as they say in 12-Step programs, the road gets narrower.  It’s pretty much up to me, pretty much.

Toni: Well, I’ll tell you, Maia, listening to your interview it’s been really interesting to hear you answer how you believe you inspire others by helping them through their own challenges and getting them on their own path of purpose based on your own experiences and then the hardships and challenges that you’ve been through are driving that inspiration into others, starting with, as you said, low self-esteem, to where you are today.  And how you explore others’ potential, you stated, is done with a high intuition and that is a gift; and I would believe that that gift also comes from the challenges, a lifetime of challenges and rewards that you’ve been through.  So it’s, hey, been there, done that; and I can sense you might be going through the same thing, work with your client; that’s what I hear.  And then as far as the inspiration that you need to … I heard truth all through that … to have people be truthful to you, to stay to your commitment of values and truth, and to find like-minded people and be aware of what your purpose is, and to just stay to that truth and have people around you that will always tell you the truth.  And that truth of how you are really fires into your inspiration and exploration of others.  Did I hit it?

Maia: You hit it!

Toni: Great.

Maia: You’re good at this!

Toni: It wasn’t me, it’s you … it’s your story, not mine, and you did a fantastic service to those that will be reading this blog and listening to the blog.  They will benefit from your story and they will learn from it, and I cannot thank you enough for your time and willingness to be part of this project.

Maia: Well, I feel honored, thanks.

Toni: Thank you so very much, Maia, and hopefully we will talk soon.

___________________________________________________________

For more information about Maia Berens:  allaboutlifecoaching.com

.