Day 19: Shayla Roberts
“ … it’s about holding the space for possibility thinking, and it’s about helping them source their own potential in a fresh way, in a way that for most people is “Oh my gosh, you know, I had forgotten completely that I just love that activity or that focus.” ”
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Toni Reece: Thank you, Shayla, so much for agreeing to do this interview, and before we jump into the questions, can you please introduce yourself and tell us what you do?
Shayla Roberts: Sure. I’m Shayla Roberts, and I work with clients all over the globe by helping them to build business and maintain work/life balance.
Toni: Great. Thank you. The very first question that I wanted to ask you, which falls nicely in line with your introduction, is who do you inspire, and how do you go about that?
Shayla: Well, I inspire my clients; certainly, that is a big part of my job, and one of the ways that I go about it is being really prepared myself, so I actually have a 2- to 3-hour personal practice every morning that puts me in the right state of mind to be working with my clients, particularly in the current climate where there is a tremendous amount of uncertainty and confusion. So I really take it seriously, and that puts me in what I call an optimal operating state, which really helps me hold my clients in the possibility of also being in that optimal state.
And then, actually hands-on how I do it is I work by phone with clients and really focus on their state of being, regardless of what business they are in. It’s anything that is running around in their brain as an issue or a problem, I help them really work through it — not so much from giving advice, but from a place of helping them really see their own solutions and believe in their own intuition. I think that is one of the biggest things that I do, is help people really listen to their own wisdom and then act on it powerfully. That is a little different than a coach who is very directive, but that is my approach.
Toni: When you do this, and I really like that phrase, the optimal operating state that you get yourself into because I would imagine that that then transfers to your client to get them into that optimal operating state, which would be … is that the ultimate goal for them?
Shayla: You know, it is. If there is a simple way to put it, I would say that it is, and then to also have them moving from a place of absolute alignment with their internal goals and values and their passions, sense of purpose, to really focus that back down. We live in a world where so many of the moves we make are ignited by things outside of ourselves, and particularly in reaction to things that come at us from the external world. And when I experience my clients doing that, I really help them move back to … okay, you know, if it’s just you and you’re aligning to what you really believe in and what you know is right for you, how would your choice be different?
Toni: And that is the inspiration as far as focusing on their state of being, but realizing their sense of purpose?
Shayla: Absolutely. And values. Very, very important.
Toni: And values, did you say, as well?
Shayla: Yes. One of the things we’re knowing in this current state — particularly people who are in the workforce — is that most of the unhappiness out there comes from a misalignment of values. In other words, people are working in environments that they don’t really relate to from their internal sense of what is right or what is appropriate for them. So for me, it’s fundamental in creating right livelihood and right living to really be looking at how we function when we’re values based.
Toni: And when you do that as part of the inspiration journey that you go on with your clients, how do you explore their potential, the potential of getting to that sense of purpose and their passion? How does that happen?
Shayla: Well, it begins with very careful listening, and people very often are not in touch with their own potential. They don’t really know what they want very often because we are all so schooled in learning to fit in in our formative years. And the work that I do is really about reintroducing my clients to their authentic selves; and once that begins to happen, then the original sense of passion and purpose that they even had as a kid begins to come back in and memory re-emerges, and I have designed a number of tools to actually help with this. But, it’s an exploration; it’s about holding the space for possibility thinking, and it’s about helping them source their own potential in a fresh way, in a way that for most people is “Oh my gosh, you know, I had forgotten completely that I just love that activity or that focus.”
Toni: Can you clarify one thing for me, Shayla, that I had written myself a note here? The words that you said were “holding a space.” Can you tell me what that means?
Shayla: Yes. You know what, I think maybe a good way to think about it metaphorically is the idea that in indigenous cultures it takes a village to raise a child, and we know that phrase from Hillary Clinton. But the idea behind that is that we learn who we are from telling our story; that is how we learn who we are, because then we see ourselves in the reactions of the people around us. So in a way, those people in the village are just being there; they’re just holding the space for that communication to come forth. And of course, in coaching it’s not totally passive in the way that it might be if you were just listening to someone’s story, because there is also gentle questioning to take a story deeper and to also fill the story out more robustly.
Toni: Thank you very, very much for that; that was awesome. Shayla, what do you need for inspiration? Where do you seek inspiration?
Shayla: Well, I am very much in the creativity game. I came into my adult years as a musician — actually a professional musician for a while — as an artist, a fine artist, and I continue to go to those sources, to creativity-based sources. This week, I will be going to Fashion Week here in Phoenix. It’s not because I’m someone who is a fashion maven, but because I know I will be surrounded by really artistic, creative people. And the week after that, I will be going to Phoenix Design Week for the same reason; I will be wandering around talking to designers and ad agencies, really just for the fun of mixing it up with creative people. Because creativity, and our reemerging, our reawakening to our creativity is also a big part of the work that I do. I mean, trusting who we are as I mentioned before, listening to our own wisdom, is all about listening to when it’s okay that we color outside of the lines, and so I like to get into the creative world. And then also I have a very rich inner world. I’m kind of an inveterate introvert, so I love some internal processes. I do practice yoga, and I do a meditational walk every morning in the desert, and I also play music every morning in kind of a meditative way, not in a performance kind of way.
Toni: So you really do look for inspiration in sources of creativity, and as you said the music and being around like-minded people in design, in fashion, and art, that’s what I’m hearing; so that you can almost funnel that inspiration from them into yourself, is that what I’m hearing?
Shayla: Yeah, it inspires me to be around people. You know, people who are really involved in creative works are risk takers, whether they are artists or musicians or even graphic designers. They are risk takers because they never know for sure whether their creations are going to be accepted, and I think that risk-taking is a really potent remedy for lack of inspiration. It’s like, when we’re willing to open up a little bit more, be a little more risk friendly in the world, not from the standpoint of being reckless, but just from being a little more bold.
Toni: And when you are looking to explore your own potential and take it further, what do you do? What do you search for? What do you use?
Shayla: Well, it’s interesting. I sort of like coincidence as a way of opening to new ideas. For instance, my trip to Fashion Design Week here in Phoenix happened out of flipping through a women’s magazine — a local glossy, beautiful women’s magazine — and just closing my eyes, opening to a page and pointing to see what would inspire me. And what I pointed to was a full page spread of a gorgeous model, and it didn’t quite fit for me because I’m not real image conscious, you know, it’s not this sort of thing that I look at fashion from a place of “Oh, I have to conform to the fashion of the day.” So I was curious about it, and I decided to read the article, and that article led me to the discovery that Fashion Week was happening this week. So it felt like, “Ahhh, well that would be really, really fun for me.” I love beautiful clothes. I love exceptional design of any kind, but particularly fashion design, even though I don’t feel obliged to always have the latest bag myself; I appreciate it. So there is a lot of that, of looking in unexpected places.
I’ve been doing an interesting thing on my morning walk. Part of my walk is on the desert, and I come back along a golf course path, and it’s just a beautiful combination of kind of natural land and cultured land. And I started kind of noticing golf balls along the way, so I began picking them up just for fun, and all of a sudden started realizing that we had piles and piles of golf balls, but they were always along the trail on the golf side. And then I started looking in the desert. I had never looked over there before, and it’s quite a ways away from the course, so I hadn’t thought there would be golf balls there, but now almost every morning just because I’m willing to sort of follow my nose and follow my intuition, I’ll find a golf ball out in the middle of the desert. That is a way that I explore my own life, is by getting off the beaten path by trying unexpected things in sort of expected places, or vice versa, and it’s just kind of keeping life fresh in that way.
Toni: It’s interesting, I’m hearing that you’re saying that you’re a big believer in following the coincidence, but yet it’s not the obvious coincidence. You take it even further to see where that is going to take you. The magazine ad that was the model but then led you to the discovery of Fashion Week to the obvious golf balls to the balls in the desert. So that’s really interesting to look further. And what I’m hearing you say as far as correlating this with what you need for inspiration and how you explore your potential, definitely ties back to them how you use that with others … that you focus on their state of being and helping them discover the possibilities, because they may not see that obvious, and so you’re taking them down that path of discovery to look for that invisible obvious. And so the same thing that you’re doing to explore your own potential definitely seems to be transferring into exploring other people’s potential.
Shayla: Well, it is, and in fact, for about the last 15 years … I think I’ve shared with you personally about the Bold Moves work that we have been developing, and that’s been a creation. It’s been a creation of a curriculum that actually is online and will help people. It will inspire people to know themselves in a different way and also to think differently as they go through their day, to be open to different ways of seeing their experience. And so I’m very inspired by creating things, creating stuff. I just love that, whether it’s music or whether it’s art. I’ve done tons of graphic design over the years myself for various business projects, and then the creation of curriculums and programs that are a little more structured than what I do as a one-on-one coach.
Toni: Well, Shayla, I can tell you I am so grateful for the snapshot that you have given of your approaches to inspiring others and exploring their potential, but also what you need to stay inspired and to explore your own potential, and how those two are really connected. And the snapshot you have provided people will learn from and benefit from, and so I thank you so very much for taking part of this project and helping us with this information.
Shayla: Oh, Toni, it has been absolutely my pleasure. I think that your vision with this project is just wonderful, and it’s just a delight to participate.
Toni: Thank you very, very much, Shayla, and hopefully we will talk soon.
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For more information about Shayla Roberts: www.boldmovesblog.com
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